2001-09-10 - 11:48 a.m.

~TRUE CLOWN STORY~

The other day at work, the phone rang. Normally, I don't answer it, but it was the end of the day, and no one was around. So I picked it up and this is the conversation I had.

Me: Good afternoon blah blah blah...

Confused Voice: Oh, I uh ... I was looking for ... JoJo the Clown?

I thought it was a joke until the phone rang again and it was the same confused voice. She said she would go look the number up again, because she had obviously gotten the wrong number. Well, I looked in the phonebook and there weren't no JoJo the Clown listed.

I am scared.

~TRUE FABIO STORY~

One time, Fabio went to the mall and I stood in line for hours to meet him. I sat in his lap and he had really dry hair. This was before the incident with the goose on the rollercoaster.

~TRUE BIRTHDAY STORY~

I just had my birthday this weekend. I am old now. But I got lots of fun presents. I love presents. Anyone out there feeling any guilt about forgetting to give me a present, I will gladly accept late presents. Email me privately for my mailing address.

~TRUE SPAZZ STORY~

A few months ago, I was trying to kill a big roach. I sprayed him, and knocked him off the wall with a broom, but then I lost him. While frightfully trying to locate him, a junebug flew up and hit me in the lips. Of course I thought the junebug was the roach (until later), so I screamed, and took off running as fast as I could until I tripped over the trashcan and slid across the kitchen floor only to stop myself by jamming my left index finger into the doorframe. Meanwhile, my friend heard the whole thing from the bathroom having no idea what was going on, and she says it is the funniest thing she ever heard. My finger still hurts.

Don't forget about the presents. Thanks.

previous - next